Monday, September 22, 2008

You Can Only Hide... Crying In The Shower...

'till the hot water runs out.  Then you have to get out, blow your nose, dry off and get back to real world.  

  I really know now what Ed Vedder was talking about when he wrote 'The waiting drove me mad...' only I'm not waiting for 'you'... I'm waiting for 'answers/instructions'.  Kind of like dreading a trip to the dentist and you're not sure if he/she will say 'Yeah, let's go ahead and take out the molar on the upper right and that should do it' or 'Gee, looks like we're going to have to yank 'em all out' ?!  Yeah, I know... bad analogy but you get the picture.  

  Anyhooo, the line up looks like this for Thursday:

10:45 Eye Exam (don't ask, it just happened to be on the same day)
1:20 Cardiologist
3:30 MRI

  I learned a little more about the MRI process today.  It involves injecting a dye called Gadolinium through the bloodstream, which shows up on the scan.  Since Cancers require a higher level of blood supply than would normally be found, they can be detected by the elevated amounts of dye in the area.  They do the first couple of scans without the dye, then an injection (which should be painless) and then additional scans with the dye in your bloodstream.  Hopefully this will give them the information on the right side that they weren't able to access through the needle biopsy as well as (but hopefully NOT) finding anything else hiding in there.    

  Then it's a follow up with Dr. Christine Lee on Monday, Sept, 29th (who I have been referring to as the Oncologist... I just looked at her card and I'm not sure that's the case?)  Christine Lee, M.D., FACS ~ Diagnosis and Treatment of Breast Diseases.  I just found out the FACS stands for: Fellow, American College of Surgeons ... so whatever her title... it looks like she's done her homework.  I guess she's the one that makes the recommendation to the surgeon??  So, if all goes as is now scheduled... I should know what the course of prescribed treatment should be by this time next Monday.  

  I tried again today to get some better information regarding what our insurance will or won't actually cover and got no where.  Seems that the only way to get info is call the 866 line and every time I try I keep getting the same guy I talked to on Friday (who had an accent somewhere between Charlie Chan and Inspector Cluso... and sounded about as interested in informing me on insurance benefits as he would be in having his fingernails pulled out with pliers) and if I have to talk to him again it's going to play out like Jules & Brett in Pulp Fiction :p so I just keep hanging up.  It's a major insurance company ... somebody else must work there?? And as far as how all this will get paid for... I really don't know... right now I'm nervous as hell about what it is they're going to do to me ... that I'm going to have to pay for!  

  And I hope the waiting doesn't drive me mad... I'm a mess already ... and I can only shower so many times a day... 

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